Montreal, Canada- For over ten years, genetic engineers have been attempting to create BioSteel – a trademark name for the super spider web that is coming out of these super goats. While they have successfully managed to insert a spider’s dragline silk gene into a goat’s DNA, they did not manage to insert some common sense into their experiment. 

At approximately 11:57 p.m. last night one of the spider-goats escaped from its pen by shooting a super web through a window and spider-goating it out of there. Reports of something that resembled a flying chupacabra were reported in surrounding towns. When asked what compelled them to create such a blasphemy against nature, head scientist William Knight replied with a cool,

BioSteel is sweeeeet maaan.”

It may or may not be true that BioSteel is 7-10 times stronger than steel, and can be stretched up to twenty times without losing its strength properties. It may or may not be way better than Kevlar. Also, the spider-goat may or may not have been pregnant. Real photographic evidence to follow.