Trans-Siberian Orchestra Banned from White House

Washington, D.C. – Even though Halloween is still over a month away, Christmas music is already in full swing. Cars, offices, and headphones across the world are already starting to play holidays-themed songs by Hanson, N’SYNC, and Mariah Carey. And, of course, Trans-Siberan Orchestra has announced their Christmas tour. The Floridian rock-band will be making […]

Kim Jong-Un Remaking Space Jam Starring Dennis Rodman

North Korea – Lucy and Ethel. Thelma and Louise. Romy and Michelle. These are some of the greatest friendships we have seen over the last two centuries. One of the more recent ones, however, is the one of North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un and former NBA star Dennis Rodman. Over the past few years, Jong-Un […]

New Healthcare Plan “Accidentally” Printed in Russian

Washington, D.C. – It’s been a hell of a month for Trump. He has lost most of his supporters, Japan’s first lady pretended not to know English to avoid him, and Sean Spicer recently quit his job as White House Press Secretary. On top of these recent downfalls of the Trump administration, the 45th president […]

Eagle That Attacked Trump Currently Recording Rap Album

Eagle That Attacked Trump Currently Recording Rap Album

Washington, D.C. – It’s hard to narrow down the most ridiculous moments of Trump’s time in the White House so far. From mocking a disabled reporter to banning some Middle Eastern countries from entering our country, the 45th President of the United States has really built up a list of crazy moments in just a few months. […]

Betsy DeVos Finally Learns Her ABCs

Betsy DeVos Finally Learns Her ABCs

Washington, D.C. – It’s a big day for Betsy DeVos. This isn’t because she passed any bills to help our flawed educational system. It does have to do with education, though. The United States Secretary of Education has made a giant leap in her own education, as she has finally learned her ABCs! “It’s been […]

Kellyanne Conway to Become New Verizon Spokesperson

Kellyanne Conway to Become New Verizon Spokesperson

Washington, D.C. – Kelleyanne Conway is in the news almost as much as Trump these days. From getting trolled by “fans” to being parodied on Saturday Night Live by the talented Kate McKinnon, it’s hard to turn on the television or check Facebook without seeing the New Jersey native’s name. Just earlier today, Conway showed […]

Donald Trump’s Cabinet Joins Local Dodgeball League

Donald Trump’s Cabinet Joins Local Dodgeball League

Washington, D.C. – As of tomorrow, Donald Trump will be our president. Even worse than that, the billionaire has rounded up a cabinet of wealthy people who know absolutely nothing about the role they will soon be taking on. To say that we are all in trouble is quite the understatement. Videos have been surfacing […]

Trump Announces Hitler Hologram as Running Mate

Trump Announces Hitler Hologram as Running Mate

Washington, DC – As the country waits to see if Hillary Clinton picks Bernie Sanders as her running mate, republican nutcase Donald Trump has announced his running mate. The hotel-mogul took to Twitter to announce that the hologram of Adolf Hitler will be his Vice President if he wins the 2016 election. At Coachella four […]

Hillary Clinton Arrested for Terrorizing Dalmatians

Hillary Clinton Arrested for Terrorizing Dalmatians

Washington, DC – Fresh off of her big win over Bernie Sanders, presidential candidate Hillary Clinton has been arrested for animal abuse. The Chicago native is still waiting to hear back on the final verdict over her email scandal, but she now has a much bigger crime to deal with. After a call from a […]

Donald Trump Pulls out of Presidential Race

Donald Trump Pulls out of Presidential Race

Washington, DC – In an epic turn of events, Donald Trump has decided to withdraw from the presidential race. The Republican candidate announced his resignation earlier today, stating that he wants to focus on his television show, The Apprentice. Trump says he is proud of how far he made it and is open to maybe running again at […]