Trans-Siberian Orchestra Banned from White House

Washington, D.C. – Even though Halloween is still over a month away, Christmas music is already in full swing. Cars, offices, and headphones across the world are already starting to play holidays-themed songs by Hanson, N’SYNC, and Mariah Carey. And, of course, Trans-Siberan Orchestra has announced their Christmas tour. The Floridian rock-band will be making […]

Kim Jong-Un Remaking Space Jam Starring Dennis Rodman

North Korea – Lucy and Ethel. Thelma and Louise. Romy and Michelle. These are some of the greatest friendships we have seen over the last two centuries. One of the more recent ones, however, is the one of North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un and former NBA star Dennis Rodman. Over the past few years, Jong-Un […]

Rob Gronkowski’s Latest Concussion Renders Him Literate

Foxborough, MA – With the Super Bowl only one weekend away, the New England Patriots and the Philadelphia Eagles are gearing up for quite a match. Both teams have been spending extra time practicing on their respected fields, working out in their gyms, and gathering around in the locker room to watch footage of their […]

Kanye West Begins Filming Where Are They Now?

Hollywood, CA – Let’s face it: Kanye won’t be around forever. The brilliant producer turned rapper has already shown his flame is fading over the past few years. He cancelled half of his tour, admitted he was broke and even pulled a Dr. Evil, begging Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerburg for one million dollars. The Chicago […]

Tom Brady Confirms Plans to Retire After Season

Foxborough, MA – Tom Brady is a household name. The California native has five Super Bowl rings and has won more Super Bowl MVPs than any other football player in the history of the sport. The Patriots quarterback has been playing for the same team since the turn of the century and wants to end […]

New Healthcare Plan “Accidentally” Printed in Russian

Washington, D.C. – It’s been a hell of a month for Trump. He has lost most of his supporters, Japan’s first lady pretended not to know English to avoid him, and Sean Spicer recently quit his job as White House Press Secretary. On top of these recent downfalls of the Trump administration, the 45th president […]

Jack McBrayer Arrested After Bar Fight on Sunset Boulevard

Jack McBrayer Arrested After Bar Fight on Sunset Boulevard

Hollywood, CA – Alcohol can really bring out the worst in a person. This was proven last after America’s sweetheart, Jack McBrayer, was arrested outside of a bar on Sunset Boulevard. The 30 Rock star was lining up some songs on a jukebox when a USC student confronted him for his choice of songs. “McBrayer comes here […]

Eugene Levy’s Eyebrows Finally Morph into Butterflies

Eugene Levy’s Eyebrows Finally Morph into Butterflies

Hollywood, CA – The time has finally come: Eugene Levy’s eyebrows have turned into butterflies. The Canadian actor has been in front of the camera for almost five decades now and the world has waited in anticipation for this moment since day one. If you’re not sure what you’re reading right now, Eugene Levy is known […]

Eagle That Attacked Trump Currently Recording Rap Album

Eagle That Attacked Trump Currently Recording Rap Album

Washington, D.C. – It’s hard to narrow down the most ridiculous moments of Trump’s time in the White House so far. From mocking a disabled reporter to banning some Middle Eastern countries from entering our country, the 45th President of the United States has really built up a list of crazy moments in just a few months. […]

Betsy DeVos Finally Learns Her ABCs

Betsy DeVos Finally Learns Her ABCs

Washington, D.C. – It’s a big day for Betsy DeVos. This isn’t because she passed any bills to help our flawed educational system. It does have to do with education, though. The United States Secretary of Education has made a giant leap in her own education, as she has finally learned her ABCs! “It’s been […]

Kellyanne Conway to Become New Verizon Spokesperson

Kellyanne Conway to Become New Verizon Spokesperson

Washington, D.C. – Kelleyanne Conway is in the news almost as much as Trump these days. From getting trolled by “fans” to being parodied on Saturday Night Live by the talented Kate McKinnon, it’s hard to turn on the television or check Facebook without seeing the New Jersey native’s name. Just earlier today, Conway showed […]