Local Teen Having Tough Time Masturbating in New Tiny House

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Longmont, CO – Tiny homes are one of the biggest trends these days. If you flip through the channels, you’ll see many new shows showcasing this¬†architectural and social movement. Married couples, bachelors, and families are all moving from their normal-sized houses into tiny homes. People are making the move to spend less and live within the comfort of a space that meets their needs and that alone. It makes sense when couples and bachelors move into tiny homes, but it’s strange that a family would move into one. Not only can tiny homes be maybe too tiny for a family, but there is also just not enough room for privacy.

The Wallingford family, who lived in Denver the past 15 years, recently moved out to the suburbs to a tiny home they had built right off of route 199. With a fifteen song and a ten-year-old daughter, friends of the family wondered if this was the best decision. “They’re a great family,” Samantha Brownstone told us. “They’re very close, but to move into a tiny home with two teenagers, that just can really take away a lot from the their privacy,” their previous neighbor exclaimed. And Brownstone isn’t wrong here, as their song, Charlie, is having quite a tough time adjusting to life in the tiny home.

“It sucks, it sucks so bad,” Charlie told us. “I had a huge room in our huge house back in Denver! I had a lock on my door and really funny sign that read ‘Beware of Dog.’ Now I have no privacy. I can’t even masturbate without shaking the whole house! And the walls are too thin!” The sophomore went on to tell us that these were his prime years for masturbation, but he just isn’t able to do it.