Cambridge, MA – At approximately 11:53 PM on Wednesday evening, the last possible and useful domain name on the Internet was purchased.

According to staff at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology Center for Useful Naming Terms, a gentleman in Spokane, WA purchased the domain name “spankmybannayoucrazymangoeatingchick.com” and thus the world was left with nonsensical URLs to choose from like “splat345noogienoogie.org” and “donaldtrumpshairisreal.com.”

“We were actually surprised that it took this long.” Said spokesperson Michelle Narzwalli. “Our computers had figured that all possible coherent domains would be spoken for by 2011. Our prognostications were off by 2 years, but we have also noticed a general dumbing down of the Internet Society since the advent of the Tea Party. It just took humans a bit longer to catch up with our calculations.”

The Center came to fruition after worried computer engineers were frightened by an incorrect news report in 1997 that stated “ourladyofsaliva.edu” was the last possible domain name. The report was redacted after it was discovered that the writer also believed that A.O.L. CDs were the peak of human technological advancement.

Supercomputers were assembled and algorithms were run. As of today, those computers will be unplugged. Their work is complete.

“All things considered,” Narzwalli added “We had a good run. All we can do now is to tip our hats to our friend in Spokane and hope that he has fun with his banana and his mango eating gal pal.”

Photograph courtesy of http://meganplus.com