Since Figure It Out first came to television in 1997, I wanted nothing more than to find a talent so I could get on the show. Seventeen years later, I still haven’t found a talent.

I think what was so great about that show was watching all of your favorite Nickeoloden characters together. Danny Tamberelli, Amanda Bynes, Keenan Thompson, Kel Mitchell; here they were, shooting the shit, and trying to guess some random talent that a twelve year old from Montanna had.

The talents were ridiculous. You look at talent shows today like American Idol and America’s Got Talent, and people are hitting every note or putting on a light show like nothing you’ve ever seen before. Figure It Out, people were displaying talents like stacking cookies.

I’ll never forget the one where some kid eat cereal out of his brother’s stomach. I can’t imagine the amount of action they are getting these days thanks to that.

The “secret slime actions” still haunt me to this day. Anytime I shrug, say “um,” or put my elbows on a table, I get a nervous twitch thinking that I’m going to get slimed

Looking back at Figure It Out, as stupid as it was, I have to say it was a landmark in my life. Summer Sanders was one of my first crushes. She was one of the first people who made me feel funny in my pants. I didn’t know what this feeling was at the time, She hasn’t been in the spotlight for quite some time, so maybe I have my chance now. Let’s just say, I’d still give anything to slime her. If you know what I mean.