Harrison Ford Crushed to Death by Giant Rubber Band Ball
Cleveland, OH – A lot celebrities and wealthy people have been retreating to safer areas with everything going on in the world right now. David Beckham and his family left their Los Angeles home for their private island to get away from the crowds and record producer, David Geffen, took shelter on his yacht. In […]
Japanese Sex Robots Also Won’t Do Anal
Tokyo, Japan – Decades ago, there were books, television shows, and movies that predicted what today might be like. Flying cars, vacations to space, and dinners that come in the size of a pill were what writers used to think would be a big part of our lives today. However, we have not seen any […]
Trans-Siberian Orchestra Banned from White House
Washington, D.C. – Even though Halloween is still over a month away, Christmas music is already in full swing. Cars, offices, and headphones across the world are already starting to play holidays-themed songs by Hanson, N’SYNC, and Mariah Carey. And, of course, Trans-Siberan Orchestra has announced their Christmas tour. The Floridian rock-band will be making […]
Dwayne Johnson Collapses on Man, Pinning Him to Hard Place
Hollywood, CA – While Dwayne Johnson may be the nicest guy in Hollywood, his size still makes it so you wouldn’t want to get in his way. And after a recent accident on the set of Disney’s ‘Jungle Cruise,” a PA has found himself in the hospital. Earlier today on the set of Walt Disney […]
Jeff Sessions Cast as Dopey in Live-Action Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
Hollywood, CA – Disney has thrown their creativity out the window when it comes to their films. We’ve seen a new Star Wars movie come out over the past four years. Winnie the Pooh will be returning to the screen on August 3rd in Marc Forster’s Christopher Robin. The official cast for The Lion King has been […]
Ken Griffey III Strikes out Once Again in Intramural Baseball
Houston, TX – First there was Ken Griffey Sr. The Pennsylvania native played in the Major Leagues for almost two decades. The three-time All Star played the majority of his career for the Braves and the Yankees and even went on to be inducted into the Hall of Fame for the former team. For the […]